Phoenix Down

I'm not exactly sure why this blog faded off. But I think i should bring it back, because like my love for Morgan this blog will never die. Shes stuck with me through some rough times, and I need to find a way to prove to her that even though I don't show my love in ways she wants or expects it doesn't mean I love her any less. Part of this is gonna need to be me changing my natural ways and learned habits to show it in ways she expects. But I think a major issue is her not realizing how much of what I do for her isn't natural for me. For starters, I rarely ever reach out to communicate with ANYONE who is not in my immediate vicinity. If we don't cross paths in person, and its not your birthday we probably wont talk unless you talk to me. So when I take the time out of my day to say hello, good morning, good night, how was your day. You are special to me. If I want to share anything that happen, no matter how small or insignificant its because I like talking to you because you make me happy. A simple comparison of how much I talk everyone else in the world to how much I talk to Morgan, (excluding in person due to things like work, and my DM responsibilities) is a staggering 50 to 1 and i'm being conservative. If you make that how often I reach out to talk to people compared to Morgan, I would be surprised if it was lower than 365 to 1.

I understand that the fact that these things are not enough, but a little perspective cant hurt.


Recently She asked me to write her a song, I assumed it was out of jest and sternly made it clear I had no intentions of writing music because I'm not good at putting words together. This upset her and thus it upset me when I discovered she was still sad about the way I responded to her request the next day.

SOOO since I beleive I have about 0 musical talent, I think I will try my hand at poetic freeverse. This is a rough draft, and if it some how comes out anything like a song, she may have her wish but for now. A poem is my goal.


She is the light that shines in the window of my heart.
The rays of her love bring my soul to rise from the depths of sleep
The warmth of her care melts the ice that grew on my heart.
Like a plant, I feed on her near infinite giving, growing by the day.
I have become stronger, rising from the dark depths from which I began
I have began to branch out, my leafs being new interests
Her glow makes me want to stand tall and proud,
to be able to respect myself, to be the man she sees in me.
And like the sun, even though she isnt always around,
I know she is always there to enrich me with her grace

She is my sol,
My life revolves around her
Without her there is only Darkness
Without her there is only Cold
She makes me grow

She brightens my day, her light makes me reach out for it
Soaking in all I can, to become the mighty tree she can make me
Her constant love and care from so high up, how do I deserve this goddess
From the ground I can see her pain, which she burdens alone,
The fires she deals with daily would destroy me in hours.
She makes me wish to grow so Tall and Strong that I,
The same seedling she found and fostered so long ago,
Can one day bear her burdens for her, she shelter her from troubles
The Shade her bare spirit from the harsh light of life she withstands.

She is my Sol,
My Life revolves around her
Without her there is only Darkness
Without her there is only Cold
I will be the one to reach out and touch the Sun
I will bear her fires, Soaking in their light, Growing everyday
I will give my Sol a safe place to lay her head